Sales Leaders Rule #7: Avoid the Drama Triangle

You know drama is one of those things that bring TV ratings. Reality TV has carved out its own category of television which is largely driven by a freight train of drama that attracts an audience. Many people are attracted to drama, but you don't want drama at your workplace. Drama is poison.

It's important that we not play games in our professional life that result in drama. How do you do that?

The first thing is to understand something called the Drama Triangle because if you know what's happening, then you can either stay out of the drama, or better yet, resolve the drama.Here are the fundamental elements of the Drama Triangle There are three positions on the triangle. You have a Persecutor, a Victim, and a Rescuer. The rules are that only one person gets each role at a time. But each role is not static, they shift between the participants quickly. 

Here's how it works.

A salesperson asks the sales manager to go on a call for them because they're overbooked. They want the manager to go on a call because it's an "easy close". The sales manager says, "Sure, I'll do it. Do you have any information?" They give the sales manager a folder of information and the Sales Manger goes on the call.

The sales manager has taken on their first role as rescuer. Unfortunately, the sales call is nothing like the sales person described. Not only does the sales manager not close the sale as the sales person expected but it appears like the opportunity has little chance of closing at all.

So, what happens? The salesperson who asked the sales manager to go on that call becomes the Victim. They're resentful toward the Rescuer thinking, "That was closable. It was on the tee. What happened?" Well, here comes the game.

The sales person's resentment at the lost opportunity is interpreted as blame or hostility toward the sales manager who goes from Rescuer to Persecutor. "What? That wasn't set up on a tee. You had no shot at that. Why don't you get your schedule in order so I don't need to rescue you? Matter of fact, you should go back through training because that deal was nothing like what you described."

The salesperson now becomes Victim. Now how are they going to get out the Victim role? They can either move back to Persecutor which will devolve into a blame game or they can bring in a third party to rescue them. Perhaps another sales person. "Has the sales manager botched any deals of yours? Can you help patch things up with the manager and I?"

This third party joins the roulette by filling the third role. If they rescue the sales person by claiming they've experienced lost deals, they fuel the original sales person's shift back to the Persecutor role. This puts the sales manager into the victim role, until he discovers that the other sales person has stoked hostilities and turns their persecuting focus on them.

The bottom line is, drama is driven by poor communication and dysfunctional interactions. It has no room at the workplace. Your job as a sales leader is to uncover drama and stop it by clearly identifying conflicts, openly addressing issues, and productively resolving tension.